Forts And The Art Of Learning

There never seemed to be a chair around the dining table lately and the sofa looked pretty bare and cushionless. Even worse, the living room had been taken over by quilted lumps and my children were nowhere to be seen. Such was my life when my boys decided to go on a fort building mission one day. They had dragged out the mats, confiscated all the pillows and blankets, and basically filled the living area with makeshift tents. What’s a mom to do? Well, as the saying goes, if you can’t beat them, join them — and then take over.

I crawled into one of their camps and decided right then and there that it could be better. I thought I’d show them how a real fort was built with reinforcing structures and nice, straight walls, and made what I thought was a pretty impressive structure (heck, I even had support beams going across the top!). Whatever. They weren’t impressed. They liked their little crawl through tunnels and rickety structures better. Mine was apparently devoid of fun.

The incident reminded me of an article I once read about letting kids learn by experiencing things themselves. It told the story of a mom whose young son was trying to shovel some gravel into his dump truck. He was struggling with the weight and shovel so she went over, took his hand, and started filling in the truck. Afterwards, she exclaimed, “We did it!” when obviously, there was no we in the doing.  Granted, I, and that mom, had had the best of intentions, but sometimes, the best lessons are the ones they learn on their own.

My homeschooling friends and I joke that we have to turn everything into a “learning moment”. Whether it’s a trip to the dentist, measuring out cookie dough, or in this case, building play forts, our children should be getting something educational out of it, right? Perhaps, but that experience doesn’t necessarily have to come from us.

A few days later, my boys did end up with fancier forts, with observation decks, even. They just figured they needed one and made it out of an inverted laundry basket, supported by pvc pipes. Even I would not have thought of that. It was a good reminder for me that sometimes, we just have to resist the urge to intervene and give the kids a chance to accomplish things on their own. Sometimes, you just have to step back and let them build their own forts.

Amida can be found writing at Journey into Unschooling.

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Tagged as: forts, kids' perspective, learning opportunities, play, teachable moment